Are You Having Sex With The Lights On?

Posted Aug 19th, 2016 in Blog

Are You Having Sex With The Lights On?

Oh yeah. I'm going there.

But the better question is, if you are in a committed relationship, are YOU even going there?

I know I know, I don't understand.

Kids, full time jobs, house responsibilities, exhaustion, I get it.

But really, I DO GET IT.

My husband and I have been married for 8 amazing years.

We are both entrepreneurs, I also work full time as a nurse, and we have an incredibly busy 2 year old.

My parents also live 7 hours away and my in-laws aren't overly involved; therefore, we manage life.

All of its crazy-ness, busy-ness, and sometimes utter chaos, just the 3 of us.

I think back to when we were first dating. Young, in love, not a care in the world, and we were doing the sideways cha cha daily, sometimes even twice a day.

Being in a long distance relationships and only having the weekends together, it was like the world stopped, and all we saw each was each other.

But then came moving and immigration from the US to Canada, a wedding, a house, our businesses, and a baby.

Suddenly it seemed like the world was just spinning.

Night after night I found myself crawling into bed and passing out from pure exhaustion.

Compound that with a post baby body and breastfeeding, I felt like my body was for everyone else and I really didn't want to be touched.

But through it all one thing never changed.

And that was the love for my husband.

In fact, I think I love him even more. He is an INCREDIBLE dad.

How did it all change that we can passionately reignite the spark?

And how did it all change that I don't have to have to turn off every light in the city just to have the confidence to get frisky?

1. I started to SEE my husband again.

When I would get home from my full time work day, before I would jump into the work for my business, or get ready to teach my fitness classes, I would center myself with a few breaths, close my eyes and do a simple meditation.

This allowed time to stop and I could really be present and engaged in our moment together. Even if it was in passing, even if it was only for a moment, I was THERE.

My thoughts weren't with what I had to do next, who I had to talk to, or how I was going to get dinner on the table before 8pm.

For me, it's those moments of honest, caring connection, that makes me want TO.. you know.

2. I started to take CONTROL of my health.

We can blame a busy schedule and competing demands as the cause of exhaustion, but unless our own self-care is number one, WE are completely to blame.

This year, I got a complete handle on my fitness, nutrition, and stress relief.

After a year of research, trial, and error, I've finally mastered how to crush my workouts, consistently, in just 30 minutes a day.

I finally have mastered what to eat, when to eat, and how much to eat at the right times of day in my lean out plan.

I have completely cut out all processed foods. I've stopped snacking at night. I drink one glass of wine a week. I rarely eat dairy and wheat, and 5 out of 7 meals each week are with plant based protein and mostly greens.

I've lost 90lbs in total, and 25lbs alone this year.

As I'm getting more lean and my clothing is fitting better, I'm feeling sexy, and confident.

My energy is incredible.

I look at myself in the mirror and I'm proud.

I'm proud of what my body can do. I'm proud of the baby we made, and I'm proud to be a sexy, smart, passionate, talented woman!

It was MY insecurities, MY doubts, and MY worries that was sabotaging MY happiness.

Sex is a basic human need, and not wanting it, really made the bells go off in my head, that something wasn't right.

3. I gave myself the gift of TIME.

The times when I feel the most stressed are when I think that I have to manage everything by myself, and everything has to be done TODAY. It's the times when I feel like it's ALL priority and only I can do it ALL.

I started giving myself more grace and time to write blogs, shoot videos, and enjoy my child's bed time routine. So what if I had to push a business call, cancel a meeting, and leave those emails until tomorrow. Too bad if someone NEEDS something from me TODAY.

Their lack of planning doesn't become my emergency.

I'm trying to change the world. I'm trying to help moms like myself, manage it all, look and feel sexy, be a confident role model for their children, and take back their health. That's my life's mission.

Not to be a firefighter of everyone's problems.

I also hired a cleaning lady and co-lead an online health and fitness TEAM.

When I gave myself the gift of time, and had faith in others, my happiness increased and my stress started to fade away.

I know that day in and day out, I'm doing the things that matter.

I've alive, vibrant, fulfilled, present, and happy.

That's the mom I want to be raising my son, not the mom I was last year.

That's how I want to show up in my marriage, past the seven year itch, and through the days when he drives me stark raving mad.

Because I love my husband.

But more importantly I love myself.

**For more information about my exclusive Lisa P's LEAN OUT Plan, email me at

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