Your Past Doesn't Give You the Right To Be an A-Hole!

Posted Oct 1st, 2016 in Blog, Owning Your Choices

Your Past Doesn't Give You the Right To Be an A-Hole!

On the weekends, I love nothing more than spending time with my two children.

No, I'm not talking about my son, Oliver who is almost 3, and my husband.

I'm talking about my son Oliver, and MY inner child.

You know.

That piece of you that is free, fun, loving, careless, present and engaged in every moment.

Kids don't stress about paying bills, unfinished work projects, unread emails, or the conversation gone bad with a family member.

Kids just PLAY.



Isn't that just the best to see?

So, I've started to add some non-negotiable time with myself and my family on the weekend into my schedule.

Friday nights are date night IN with my husband, (because who can get a reliable sitter these days?)

Saturday afternoons are meant for crafting and drawing, being creative with Oliver.

And Sundays are a complete family outing/ unplugged day.

I quickly realized that in growing my businesses, working full time, and coaching many moms in their health and fitness, I was starting to work myself to death.

And I didn't want to end up rich and noteworthy, but alone and unfulfilled.

Richness to me is in the quality of my relationships, not the number in my bank account.

But for some people, that's not the case.

For some people, their inner child is not a good one.

Martyn Carruthers, from Soulwork Systemic Coaching, describes your inner child as being immature and acting this way,

"Immature adults often lack integrity and may behave like they are empty inside. They may have little idea of who they are - although they always know what they need. Not only are they confused about who they are, they are confused about who you are. And if you allow yourself to become entangled with them, you may feel just as confused."

Have you ever experienced this before?

You think you know someone really well and then end up getting burned when they act unprofessional in business and immature in life.

I had this exact experience this past month.

And it really hit home for me the "I" word.


How you treat people on the good days AND bad days matter.

How you make people feel matters.

How you coach people and talk to them when they are struggling matters.

How you handle conflict and disagreements matters.

How you handle hurt feelings matter.

How you parent matters.

How you react when things don't go your way matters.

How you talk to people in private matters.

Meeting people where they are at... matters.

It doesn't matter whether you came from nothing or you are a multi-millionaire, you MUST treat people with respect and uphold YOUR integrity.

I used to get really, really angry, and say things that I didn't mean in conflict situations.

But it always left me feeling like a jerk once the argument and dust settled.

Now, when people are rude, unfair, mean, bullying or just plan assholes to me, I stop and think....

(As Brendon Burchard says) "How would my highest self act?"

Even though I want to tell them to go fly a kite, or something MUCH worse :),

I don't.

Because that's not WHO I AM.

Turning the other cheek is SO HARD, but what's the alternative?

Guilt and shame come from acting differently than who you KNOW you are.

So I treat people with respect......

And know that KARMA always works its way out in the end!

I'm curious.....How do you handle immature or rude people?

What would be your advice?

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