2017: I Take My Hands Off the Wheel

Posted Jan 1st, 2017 in Owning Your Choices, Overcoming Perfectionism and Failure

2017: I Take My Hands Off the Wheel

New Year Eve and New Years Day are such a reflective time for me.

As a person who struggles with sitting down and relaxing, I have to almost force myself into this practice of reflection.

But it's in this act of pausing,

Not creating, working, grinding, parenting, training, coaching, cleaning, wife-ing (is that a word? It is now!), that dreaming can happen.

As 2016 came to a close and I welcomed 2017, I realized that most my success in 2016 came down to one thing:

I took my hands off the wheel.

As a do-er, a fixer, a planner, I like to be one step ahead.

But sometimes you have to just dream big, trust the process, show up as your best everyday.

The rest will take care of itself.

When you try to perfect everything, you miss the joy in the journey.

When you try to be one step ahead, you miss the life lessons that are right in front of you.

I think back to our recent trip to the water park in Niagara.

We were at the arcade and Oliver saw a stuffed animal behind the counter that you could win of his favorite Paw Patrol characters.

I had a memory of my own dad winning me stuffed animals as a kid in Ocean City Maryland on the boardwalk on a rare family vacation.

I guess a piece of me wanted to re-create that memory, since I grieve that relationship that's lost.

So instantly I sprung into action.

I walked around the arcade analyzing the machines.

I finally found the one that could spit out a gazillion tickets (Which is what you need to win anything medium sized at those arcades).

I had to hit a button exactly on the spot where it said jackpot as the ball spun around in a circle.

I watched that ball.

Counted the seconds from a strategic point and planned my attack.

First try, unsuccessful.

Second, no jackpot.

Third, no jackpot.

Frustration set in.

Fourth, no jackpot.

I paused.

Why am I feeling so angry?

This is supposed to be fun.

I watched that ball, and then something AWESOME happened.

I closed my eyes, and I decided I was going to press the button at a random moment.

No calculating, no planning, no counting.

With eyes closed, I pressed that button...


Almost in disbelief, as the buzzers sounded, lights blared, and tickets started spitting out,

I smiled. I laughed.

I took my hand off the wheel,

Or the button for the matter.

And it couldn't have felt more right!

It's almost like when you spin out on ice when driving.

When you try to manipulate and jerk the wheel, you make it worse.

When you let your tires do what they are supposed to do, you end up OK most times.

When you're water skiing and you fall, if you don't let go, you get slammed and beat up by the waves.

When you let go and surrender to what is, the journey is so much smoother.

So 2017 is all about continuing to take my hands off the wheel.

In 2016 I did some really scary shit.

I launched my new personal development brand.

I wrote and published a book.

I did a bikini competition and competed against beautiful women 10 years younger than me.

I coached the most women online, and trained the most clients in person to date.

We took the most family vacations, and date nights, and attended the most personal development conferences.

I allowed myself to be present, focused, and engaged.

In my reflection, I realized that I felt the most alive when I was just soaking in each experience.

So dream big, the biggest and boldest you possibly can, and show up each day the very best that you can.

Whatever your 100% is-- GIVE IT.

And enjoy the ride.

It will all be OK in the end.

I promise.

*Do you need help with setting some goals and crushing them? My book can help! Check it out here!*

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