Blame (v) to assign responsibility for a fault or wrong.
I used to despise this word.
Because it's easy.
It's easy to blame others for your circumstance, mood, and decisions.
You aren't just angry or upset with someone.
You BLAMMMEEEEEEEEE them.
But recently, I had a moment of reflection.
Maybe because my son just started his first year of school.
Or my husband and I just celebrated 9 years of marriage.
Or I just hosted a weekend retreat with my best clients to teach them how to unlock their potential in health, happiness, and business.
I can't put my finger on the exact thing that made me reflect,
But I had a moment of peace with my thoughts.
And if you're like me.
My brain runs a mile a minute,
In analyze, and create, and plan mode.
I think the problem with our -- I want it now-- society is that we rarely to stop and realize how far we've come. (Me included)
We've become inundated with to do's and deadlines,
Vision boards and status,
Fear and doubt.
Not peace and reflection.
But in my moment of meditation and yoga, at my retreat,
I had ONE SIMPLE GRACIOUS THOUGHT.
That had me uttering 2 simple words.
You can go to therapy and talk all you want.
You can exercise off a bad mood.
You can laugh with friends and share memories,
But when you crawl in bed at night, if you aren't proud of the person you've become,
Or you have unrest, then happiness is only temporary.
So it had me changing my perspective and reflecting on the things that I used to BLAME.
Here's the flip for me:
1) I blame my mom for always criticizing and for my self-esteem and confidence issues.....Thank you mom, because learning to push past fear and make choices for myself has helped me catapult forward in my health, happiness, and business.
2) I blame the kids growing up and nurses who bullied me for thinking I'm not enough... Thank you for testing me, because it fueled a fire inside me to say, YES YOU CAN.. WATCH ME, and show others how to do the same.
3) I blame my midwife for abusing me throughout my birth, for making me second guess the choices I made about my body and our baby....Thank you for showing me that I will always fight for what's right for my body, my son, and our family, and helping me own my vulnerability. You've shown me that I can be a warrior.
4) I blame my dad for abandoning me, and not standing up to my mom, severing our relationship, and missing out on memorable moments in my life and being proud of me....Thank you for teaching me that the only approval I need in my life is my own.
So I blame.
I blame as my highest self, with my most open heart, in a gracious way.
And I forgive too.
I'm not perfect.
But I'm pretty proud of the person I've become, the choices I've made, and what my future holds.
What about you?
How can you shift your blame to gratitude?