This day was a good day.
I showered, did my hair, put on some make up.
I was speaking virtually all day, on podcasts, at a virtual summit, client calls, and for social media videos.
But other days, it was a struggle to even get a shower.
I thought I was time pressed before COVID hit, now I wonder, what DID I do with all my time before I was helping to cook every meal, helping our 6 year old navigate virtual schooling in 2nd grade, cleaning my home, doing the laundry, running a successful business, and looking after out pets.
I have an incredibly supportive hands on husband, but I found myself looking at all there was to DO and feeling very alone.
All there was to do, not what we've done.
All there was to do, not how to just BE.
And self care? I'm ruthless with my Peloton workouts, but I found myself skipping meals, and staying up late.
For the first few months, I spun myself so tight, and tried to micromanage every details of my life to "have it all together."
But maybe falling apart was the point?
Maybe patterns had to be broken, to allow for growth?
I didn't have an epic crash, that forced me to change. It was more a subtle re-arranging of my mindset.
Instead of saying,
"What didn't I get done today?"
I celebrated all that I did get done.
I stopped tracking my success by my to-do list, and started to track my happiness.
Instead of saying,
"What went wrong today?"
I started asking,
"What went right with today?"
I started to celebrate journaling, meditating, closing a sales call, eating a healthy lunch, cancelling a meeting, going on a 15 minute walk, pushing my meeting so I could cuddle with my son on the couch.
Our business has boomed this past year. I left my full time job, we're renovating our house and paying off our mortgage at record speed.
We are blessed, and we worked tirelessly to position ourselves as valuable, needed, relevant.
This year I didn't need to learn how to make more impact or income. This year I had to learn how to prioritize myself. I had to learn how to see the good, and not measure my worth by what I've accomplished in a day.
This year wasn't about achievement, this year was about gratitude and not giving up on myself.
As I was journaling one evening, my son decided that he wanted to join in. He wrote,
"Never give up. You can do this. You got this."
Without prompting, without a discussion. Those words flowed out of his pen, and he told me it was to help him with how he's feeling this year.
That's what went right this year. Showing my son that mom has good and bad days. Mom doesn't hide her emotions. Mom doesn't quit. We're in this together.
As you wind down this year, take some time to reflect what went right.
What patterns did you break?
What did you learn about yourself?
What unexpected blessing came your way?
Wishing you a peaceful, joyful, profitable, fruitful, and productive 2021. See you out there!
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