When you try to perfect everything, you miss the joy in the journey. When you try to be one step ahead, you miss the life lessons that are right in front of you Your life experiences are so much smoother when you take your hands off the wheel.
I write them for redemption. Redemption for the relationship with myself. Because that's the only one I can control. And it's the only one in which I can forgive myself, And know that I'm not the one who is broken. I write because if I try to shovel my feelings under the carpet, it's my own sanity that suffers. Suffering with trying to make a relationship right. And try as hard as you will, you can't make anyone do anything.
It's easier to stuff down emotions with food and alcohol, then it is to face the stress and drama that the holidays can sometimes bring. I found myself 60lbs overweight, unhappy, and making New Years Resolutions that I'd never keep, until I started asking this one question.
Scars are a funny thing. They tell the story of pain, accidents, and the places you've been. Usually with every good scar there is a story behind it. But with my scars, they weren't always visible. You couldn't see any of mine in the pictures from my bikini competition, but there's definitely a story that I want to tell.
For a recovering perfectionist, this competition was a completely new head game. A game I wasn't really prepared to play. And as the social media likes came in, and the messages of how I'm crushing it flooded my inbox, I was filled with only temporary happiness. It left me thinking, "When will it ever be enough?"
All because of one competition, I started to feel like I wasn't measuring up in MULTIPLE areas of my life. And it was rooted in ONE MAIN THING. Comparison. How my body looked compared to other women. How much money I make in my business compared to other health and fitness coaches. How happy I am in my marriage. How successful I'm am in potty training and bed time with my toddler...
Regret and repel are great motivators. Sometimes you have to know what you don't want in order to get what you do. How are you spending your time lately? Do you own it with a meaningful, guilt free routine?
You have to make sure that if you're quitting, it's for the right reasons. You see, many people are going to try to close the door to your success. Many people are going to actually SLAM the door in your face to success, SO why self-sabotage? We have many people who are willing to do that for us, so why do it to ourselves?
I quickly realized that in growing my businesses, working full time, and coaching many moms in their health and fitness, I was starting to work myself to death. And I didn't want to end up rich and noteworthy, but alone and unfulfilled. Richness to me is in the quality of my relationships, not the number in my bank account. But for some people, that's not the case. For some people, their inner child is not a good one.
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